Why Pre-Marital Counseling is Essential for a Strong Marriage

Ever wonder why some marriages seem to thrive while others unravel at the first sign of trouble? It’s not always about love—sometimes, it’s about preparation. Before saying “I do,” many couples spend months planning the perfect wedding… but how much time do they spend preparing for the marriage itself? That’s where pre-marital counseling comes in—and spoiler alert—it’s a total game-changer.

In this post, we’re diving into why pre-marital counseling is essential for a strong, lasting marriage. Not only will we explore the benefits, but we’ll also unpack some rarely discussed truths that most websites don’t mention. If you're planning a life together, this is the prep you don’t want to skip.

Marriage is More Than a Vibe—It’s a Skillset

Let’s be real: love is beautiful, but it doesn’t come with a manual. Most of us grow up learning about romance from movies, social media, or our parents’ relationships—none of which necessarily give us the emotional tools we need to build a thriving partnership.

That’s where pre-marital counseling steps in. It's like a training ground for real-life relationship skills: conflict resolution, financial planning, communication styles, and emotional safety—all the essentials for lifelong teamwork.

And get this: according to a study, couples who participate in pre-marital counseling have a 30% higher marital success rate than those who don’t. That's not just encouraging—it’s empowering.

What You Think You Know vs. What You Need to Know

Most couples think they’ve had all the “big talks”—kids, money, careers—but the truth is, there’s often a lot left unsaid. Pre-marital counseling digs into the uncomfortable stuff, the things couples don’t even know they need to talk about, like:

• Family patterns: Are you unknowingly repeating unhealthy dynamics from your upbringing?

• Sexual expectations: What are your needs and boundaries? How will you navigate changes over time?

• Mental health awareness: How will anxiety, depression, or past trauma play a role in your relationship?

Here’s something not everyone tells you: unresolved personal issues will show up in your marriage. Pre-marital counseling helps you spot them early—before they morph into resentment or distance.

The Emotional Check-Up You Didn’t Know You Needed

Let’s compare marriage to physical health for a second. If you had a persistent pain in your chest, you wouldn’t just brush it off and hope it goes away—you’d see a doctor, right? The same should go for your emotional and relational health. But here’s the thing: many couples walk down the aisle carrying emotional tension, unresolved trauma, or unspoken expectations... and just hope love will be enough to smooth it all over.

Unfortunately, love alone doesn’t automatically equip you with the tools to navigate conflict, stress, or change.

According to the American Psychological Association, around 40-50% of marriages in the U.S. end in divorce. But here’s what’s often missed—divorce isn’t usually triggered by one big event. It’s a slow build-up of unaddressed issues, poor communication, and emotional disconnection over time.

Many couples simply never pause to check in on their emotional compatibility. It’s not about whether you’re both “good people”—it’s about whether you understand each other’s internal world, know how to support one another during stress, and are emotionally available in a sustainable way.

That’s where pre-marital counseling becomes essential. At Wellman Psychology in Chicago, couples get more than surface-level advice—they receive a safe, supportive space to unpack baggage, align on life values, and understand each other’s emotional triggers and coping strategies.

Think of it as a relationship MRI—it shows you what’s working, what’s hiding beneath the surface, and what needs a little rehab. And even if your relationship feels “perfect,” therapy can uncover subtle dynamics that—if ignored—could become future sources of stress. Catching them early gives you the opportunity to grow stronger together.

Couples often leave pre-marital counseling feeling more seen, more connected, and more confident in their ability to face life’s curveballs. That’s because when emotional safety is built before marriage, couples are better equipped to handle challenges within it.

It’s Not Just About Avoiding Divorce—It’s About Thriving

Here’s a mindset shift: pre-marital counseling isn’t just about “problem prevention.” It’s about relationship optimization. Too many people see therapy as something to turn to only when things fall apart—but what if we flipped that narrative?

What if counseling were the foundation that helped you create a marriage so strong, divorce never had a chance?

Imagine entering marriage with this kind of clarity and confidence:

• You and your partner know how to fight fair—disagreements don’t spiral into yelling matches or cold silences. Instead, you both know how to pause, communicate, and reconnect.

• You’ve created a shared financial philosophy—one that’s rooted in trust, transparency, and teamwork. No hidden debts. No surprise, credit cards. Just mutual respect and a long-term plan.

• You understand each other’s love languages—and intentionally express them every day. Whether it's through acts of service, words of affirmation, or quality time, you know how to meet each other’s emotional needs.

• Most importantly, your relationship is grounded in emotional safety—a space where both partners feel heard, validated, and valued. You’re not walking on eggshells. You’re walking together.
  

This is the kind of marriage that doesn’t just survive—it thrives.

And here’s what most websites won’t tell you: thriving marriages don’t happen by accident. They’re built on a strong emotional infrastructure. That means both partners are doing the inner work, learning how to regulate their emotions, resolve conflict, and communicate with compassion.

When you invest in pre-marital counseling—especially with a supportive, skilled team like Wellman Psychology in Chicago—you’re not just reducing your risk of divorce. You’re increasing your capacity for joy, growth, and long-term partnership.

Because here’s the truth: the goal of marriage isn’t just to “stay married.” It’s to build a life together that’s worth staying for.

The Topics Most People Skip (But Shouldn't)

Let’s talk about some real stuff—topics that most couples avoid but are essential to cover:

1. In-Law Boundaries

How often will your in-laws visit? What happens if a parent oversteps? Most couples avoid this conversation until there’s a blow-up. Don’t wait—get clear now.

2. Mental Health Support Plans

What happens if one partner experiences burnout, grief, or depression? Do you know how to support each other in those moments? Pre-marital counseling can guide you in creating a plan of care before life gets messy.

3. Career Ambitions & Sacrifices

What if one of you wants to relocate for work? Who makes the career sacrifice, and why? These are loaded conversations, and having them with a licensed therapist can reduce future conflict.

4. Sexual Compatibility Over Time

It’s not just about now—it's about ten years from now. How do you plan to keep intimacy alive? What if one person’s desire shifts? Talking about this proactively makes a huge difference.

The Chicago Difference: Why Location Matters

If you’re in Chicago, you’re in luck. Wellman Psychology offers Pre Marital Counseling Chicago that goes beyond the basics. Their therapists don’t use cookie-cutter templates—they tailor the sessions to the real needs of each couple.

At Wellman, you’re not just getting advice—you’re building a personalized blueprint for your relationship. Their approach combines emotional insight, practical tools, and mental health support in one safe, confidential space.

Whether you’re newly engaged or a year into planning, don’t wait. The earlier you start, the more time you have to build a relationship that lasts.

Think of Counseling as an Investment, Not a Fix

Here’s a shift in mindset: counseling isn’t a last resort. It’s a first step toward something better. You wouldn’t build a house without a blueprint—why build a marriage without one?

Here’s another stat to chew on: Couples who attend at least 6 pre-marital counseling sessions report significantly higher marital satisfaction, even 5 years down the line.

That’s not therapy. That’s a long-term strategy.

In Summary: Love with Intention

Marriage isn’t just about falling in love—it’s about staying in love. And that takes effort, tools, and self-awareness.

Pre-marital counseling helps couples enter marriage with open eyes, open hearts, and the confidence that they’re ready, not just for the honeymoon, but for the years that follow.

If you’re serious about your relationship, be serious about how you prepare for it.

Ready to Build Something Real?

If you and your partner are planning forever, don’t wing it. Wellman Psychology’s Pre Marital Counseling Chicago service offers compassionate, expert support that meets you where you are. Whether you’re hoping to resolve lingering questions or simply strengthen your foundation, this is your chance to invest in the relationship you’re building.

Book your first session today and:

1. Get personalized guidance from experienced professionals.

2. Strengthen communication and deepen emotional intimacy.

3. Prepare for conflict with tools, not fear.

4. Unpack any mental health concerns before they become relationship issues.

5. Step into marriage with confidence, clarity, and commitment.

Because love deserves more than just a wedding—it deserves a plan.

Feel free to check out our social media links below:

• Facebook 

• Instagram

• Twitter

• GMB

Find out more articles that can help you below:

How Marital Counseling Can Help Strengthen Relationships

Common Issues Addressed in Marriage Counseling

When to Seek Relationship Counseling

Common Issues Addressed in Marriage Counseling

Is it love… or just conflict in disguise?

Let’s be real: every couple hits a bump in the road. Maybe even a few potholes. But how do you know when those recurring arguments or awkward silences are normal… or signs of something deeper that could benefit from professional help? Here’s a question to consider—what if the real issue in your relationship isn’t what you think it is? That’s where marriage counseling comes in. It helps couples uncover not just the surface problems, but the root causes that keep you stuck on repeat.

Sure, the internet is full of generic advice like “communication is key” and “never go to bed angry.” But real-life counseling goes way deeper. Let’s talk about the less obvious issues that bring couples into therapy, backed by data—and maybe even a little self-reflection. And if you’re in or near Andersonville, we’ll introduce you to a trusted name to help you and your partner find your way back to each other: Wellman Psychology.

1. Emotional Neglect (Not Just “Drifting Apart”)

You might not be yelling or slamming doors, but that doesn’t mean everything’s okay. Emotional neglect is one of the most common (yet under-discussed) reasons couples seek therapy. It's not about what’s happening—it’s about what’s not.

Studies from the Gottman Institute show that nearly 60% of couples report feeling “emotionally distant” from their partners at some point. What’s tricky is that it often builds slowly. You stop sharing your day. You avoid eye contact. Intimacy drops—not just sex, but hugs, kisses, and vulnerable conversations.

Unlike infidelity or blowout fights, emotional neglect is easy to ignore. But it’s just as dangerous, often leading to resentment, loneliness, and, yes, infidelity down the road.

2. The Power Struggle Phase That Never Ended

Every couple goes through the “power struggle” phase, usually right after the honeymoon period. You discover annoying habits. Disagreements flare. But for some couples, this phase never ends. Instead of resolving conflict, they just escalate it or avoid it entirely.

According to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, two-thirds of couples cite “constant arguing” as their top issue, but many don’t realize these aren’t just random fights—they’re often about control and unmet needs.

Therapy helps couples realize that behind every argument about dishes or screen time is a deeper conversation about respect, validation, or autonomy.

3. Unhealed Individual Trauma

Here’s one that many blogs don’t talk about: your relationship issues might be tied to personal trauma, and you may not even realize it.

Unresolved childhood trauma, PTSD, or anxiety disorders can sneak into a marriage like a quiet saboteur. One partner may shut down emotionally. The other may become overly controlling or reactive. And unless both partners are aware of this dynamic, they may keep blaming each other instead of understanding what’s really going on.

Research from the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy found that up to 42% of couples in therapy have one or both partners with significant trauma histories. That’s not a personal failure—it’s a human one.

This is why couples therapy often involves individual growth. At Wellman Psychology, our Psychotherapy Andersonville service takes this holistic approach, helping each partner explore their inner world while improving the relationship at large.

4. The “Roommate Syndrome”

You know what’s surprisingly common but rarely addressed? Couples who become amazing roommates but terrible romantic partners.

You split bills. You share chores. You make a great parenting team. But there’s no spark. No flirting. No fun.

The National Marriage Project reports that over 45% of couples feel more like roommates than romantic partners after 7 years together. Marriage counseling helps partners rebuild that connection—not by going back to who you were, but by rediscovering who you are now and how to evolve together.

5. Unequal Emotional Labor

This isn’t just about chores or who does the dishes. Emotional labor is the invisible work of remembering birthdays, calming the kids, managing the family schedule, and even noticing when your partner’s had a hard day.

Often, one partner feels emotionally “burnt out” while the other is unaware of the imbalance. According to a survey by Pew Research Center, 66% of women in heterosexual relationships report carrying the majority of emotional labor, even when both partners work full-time.

Marriage counseling can shine a light on this hidden dynamic—and help rebalance the emotional workload in a way that feels fair and supportive.

6. Differing Definitions of Intimacy

Here’s something people don’t always realize: intimacy means different things to different people.

One partner may crave physical closeness, while the other needs emotional vulnerability. One might find intimacy in shared adventures, the other in late-night talks. Without understanding these differences, both partners can end up feeling rejected, even when they’re both trying.

A 2021 study published in Sexual and Relationship Therapy found that over 70% of couples have mismatched intimacy needs. Not just sexually, but emotionally and even spiritually.

Counseling helps couples learn each other’s “intimacy languages” and create connection in ways that feel authentic, not forced.

7. Financial Infidelity (Yes, It’s a Real Thing)

We all know about sexual infidelity, but did you know financial infidelity is one of the fastest-growing causes of relational stress?

Hiding purchases. Secret credit cards. Not being honest about debt. These may seem small, but they erode trust over time. A study by the National Endowment for Financial Education found that 43% of adults admit to financially deceiving their partner.

Marriage counseling provides a safe space to unpack these issues, create transparency, and work toward shared financial goals without blame.

8. Cultural and Family Background Differences

Here’s another often-overlooked factor: your upbringing shapes your expectations for love.

Maybe one of you grew up in a loud, expressive household, while the other was taught to keep emotions private. Maybe your ideas about gender roles, parenting, or even family involvement clash without you realizing it.

In multicultural or interfaith marriages, these differences are even more pronounced—and often ignored until conflict arises. Therapy helps couples navigate these complex dynamics with curiosity, not judgment.

The Role of Therapy in Long-Term Love

Look—therapy isn’t about “fixing” one partner. It’s about creating a space where both of you can feel seen, heard, and valued. At Wellman Psychology, we know that couples are more than the sum of their problems. With our Psychotherapy Andersonville services, we help couples reconnect not just with each other, but with themselves.

Whether you’re navigating emotional distance, trauma, or just feeling stuck in the same old patterns, there’s a way forward. And it starts with asking for help—not because you’re failing, but because you care enough to grow.

It’s Not Too Late to Reconnect

Marriage isn’t supposed to be perfect. It’s supposed to be real. And real relationships come with conflict, confusion, and complexity. But they also come with the opportunity for connection, growth, and healing—especially when both partners are willing to show up.

You don’t have to do this alone. If you and your partner are ready to break the cycle, rediscover intimacy, and build a stronger foundation for your future, therapy might just be the most loving step you can take.

If your relationship has felt distant, repetitive, or overwhelming, don’t wait for a breaking point.
Reach out to Wellman Psychology and explore how our Psychotherapy Andersonville service can support your journey back to each other. Our experienced therapists are here to guide you through the tough stuff—with compassion, curiosity, and care.
 

You deserve a relationship that feels safe, passionate, and fulfilling. Let’s work together to help you build it, starting today.

Feel free to check out our social media links below:

• Facebook 

• Instagram

• Twitter

• GMB

Find out more articles that can help you below:

How Marital Counseling Can Help Strengthen Relationships

Why Pre-Marital Counseling is Essential for a Strong Marriage

When to Seek Relationship Counseling

How To Recover From Binge Eating Disorder

Steps to Recover from Binge Eating Disorder with Professional Help

Have you ever caught yourself asking, "How do I recover from binge eating disorder?" Maybe it’s after a late-night binge or another promise to “start fresh tomorrow.” You’re not alone—and more importantly, recovery is absolutely possible. Binge eating disorder (BED) is the most common eating disorder in the U.S., affecting more people than anorexia and bulimia combined. Yet it often goes undiscussed, underdiagnosed, and misunderstood.

If you’re dealing with eating problems, you’ve likely been bombarded with surface-level advice: “Just eat mindfully,” or “Try portion control.” Sound familiar? While these tips aren’t necessarily bad, they skip over the deeper emotional, psychological, and neurobiological layers of BED. That’s where professional support, like the compassionate care at Wellman Psychology in Lincoln Park, can be transformative.

Let’s walk through the steps to recovery, backed by science, and some insights most articles skip.

Step 1: Understanding That Binge Eating Is Not About Willpower

First things first: BED is not a failure of willpower or discipline.

It’s a complex mental health condition that the American Psychiatric Association officially recognized in the DSM-5 in 2013. That means it’s not just “overeating sometimes”—it involves recurrent episodes of consuming large quantities of food, often rapidly and in secret, followed by guilt, shame, or even disgust.

Here’s a powerful stat: Over 2.8 million Americans are estimated to be struggling with BED at any given time. And that’s just in the U.S.

Binge eating often stems from a mix of emotional dysregulation, dieting behaviors, childhood trauma, and even genetic predisposition. In other words, telling someone to "just stop" is like telling someone with asthma to “just breathe.”

Step 2: Acknowledge the Impact—And Your Strength

You might already know that binge eating can lead to weight gain, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes—but what about the psychological toll?

BED is linked to:

• Anxiety disorders (up to 65% of those with BED)

• Depression (nearly 50%)

• Suicidal ideation (more common than in any other eating disorder)

These numbers aren’t meant to scare you—they're to show you that this disorder is serious and deserving of professional help.

But here’s the thing: the very fact that you’re reading this, seeking answers, means you’re already on your way. It takes strength to even consider help.

Step 3: Start with a Qualified Mental Health Professional

This is the step that makes the biggest difference.

Working with a licensed therapist or psychologist who understands BED is critical. One powerful, evidence-backed approach is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)—the gold standard for BED treatment. CBT helps you identify harmful thought patterns, address emotional triggers, and build healthy coping strategies.

Another lesser-known but promising method is Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), originally designed for borderline personality disorder. It’s now being used to help individuals with binge eating learn distress tolerance, emotion regulation, and mindfulness—skills many people with BED find difficult to develop alone.

Wellman Psychology offers Psychotherapy Lincoln Park with specialists who are experienced in treating eating disorders with an integrative, trauma-informed lens. Their approach doesn’t just target food behaviors—it helps you understand why those behaviors developed in the first place.

Step 4: Address Co-Occurring Issues

Here's something many articles won’t tell you: most people with BED don’t only struggle with eating.

Roughly 80% of individuals with BED have at least one other psychological disorder, often depression, anxiety, PTSD, or ADHD. Sometimes, the bingeing is a response to emotional overload. Other times, it’s tied to unprocessed trauma.

That’s why your treatment plan should never just focus on food. At Wellman Psychology, therapists help you explore all underlying patterns—whether it’s chronic self-criticism, unresolved grief, or emotional suppression.

A common hidden factor? Attachment trauma. People who grew up in emotionally neglectful households often develop disordered eating as a way to “soothe” unmet emotional needs. Understanding your emotional blueprints is key to healing long-term.

Step 5: Build a Relapse-Resistant Routine

Recovering from BED isn’t a straight line. There will be ups and downs, but having a solid, supportive routine increases resilience.

Here are some lesser-discussed practices to add to your recovery toolbox:

Body neutrality over body positivity

If "loving your body" feels too far off, aim for neutrality first. It’s okay to say, “I don’t love my body today, but I respect it enough to feed it.”

Sensory satisfaction

Not all binges are about quantity. Many are about craving sensory satisfaction. When you eat in recovery, aim for pleasure, not punishment. Taste, texture, temperature—pay attention.

Meal flexibility

Rigid meal plans can backfire. Many people recover faster when they allow for flexibility and spontaneity in eating, not strict control.

Name your triggers

Keep a log—not of what you eat, but of how you feel before and after. Notice emotional patterns that lead to binges. Awareness is power.

Step 6: Join a Community or Group Therapy

Isolation fuels binge eating.

Many people feel deep shame about their eating habits, which leads to secrecy and further disconnection. Group therapy or support groups provide a safe, non-judgmental space where you realize you’re not broken, and you’re definitely not alone.

At Wellman Psychology, group sessions are available for individuals with eating concerns, body image issues, or emotional regulation challenges. Connecting with others who “get it” is often a turning point in recovery.

Step 7: Redefine Success

Success in recovery doesn’t mean “never binge again.”

Success might mean:

• Having fewer binge episodes

• Bouncing back quicker without spiraling

• Feeling less guilt

• Eating a meal with zero food rules

It’s about progress, not perfection. Give yourself the grace to grow in phases.

Key Takeaways

• Binge Eating Disorder is not about willpower—it’s a serious, treatable mental health condition.

• Therapy works, especially approaches like CBT and DBT.

• Addressing underlying emotional or trauma-based triggers is essential for lasting recovery.

• You don’t have to go it alone. Group support and a trained therapist can change everything.

• Success in recovery is not about being perfect—it’s about understanding and accepting yourself.

Let’s Talk—You Deserve Support

If you’re someone struggling with binge eating or disordered eating patterns, there’s absolutely no shame in reaching out. Healing is a process, and you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Wellman Psychology is here to support you with compassionate, evidence-based Psychotherapy Lincoln Park. Whether you’re dealing with anxiety, body image concerns, or emotional eating, our therapists are ready to help you rediscover balance and peace with food—and with yourself.

Take the first step today.

• Don’t wait for “rock bottom”—the right time to seek help is now.

• You are worthy of recovery, no matter how long you’ve been struggling.

• Healing starts when you reach out and speak your truth.

• Our team is here to listen, guide, and support you with zero judgment.

• Contact Wellman Psychology to schedule a session and start your journey back to yourself.

Feel free to check out our social media links below:

• Facebook 

• Instagram

• Twitter

• GMB

Find out more articles that can help you below:

What Are the Symptoms of Binge Eating Disorder?

What Is Clinical Assessment in Psychology

What Causes Trauma in Childhood

Common Challenges Faced in LGBTQ Therapy and How to Overcome Them

When was the last time you felt truly seen in a therapy session?

For many LGBTQ folks, the answer is a heavy never. Therapy is supposed to be a safe place, but for some, it’s yet another space that doesn’t quite fit. Whether it's subtle assumptions, lack of cultural understanding, or outright bias, LGBTQ individuals often find themselves navigating extra layers just to get basic mental health support. And while lots of articles talk about finding an affirming therapist, very few dive into the less obvious hurdles — the ones that aren’t talked about openly, but still leave deep marks.

Let’s explore the common (and not-so-common) challenges faced in LGBTQ therapy — and more importantly, how to work through them.

1. Therapists With Good Intentions, But Limited Understanding

A surprising number of therapists claim to be "LGBTQ-friendly," but that label doesn't always hold up in practice.

Many clients report that their therapists seemed supportive on the surface, but lacked a nuanced understanding of LGBTQ culture, gender diversity, or intersectional experiences. According to a 2022 report from The Trevor Project, 60% of LGBTQ youth said they wanted mental health care but didn’t get it, and a major barrier was fear that the provider wouldn’t understand their identity or experiences.

Sometimes, therapists unintentionally ask invasive or inappropriate questions, like, “When did you decide to be gay?” or “Are you sure you’re trans?” These microaggressions, while not always malicious, can erode trust.

How to Overcome It:
Look for providers who go beyond just labeling themselves as “affirming.” Ask questions like:

• “What kind of training have you had in LGBTQ issues?”

• “How do you support trans and non-binary clients?”
  At Wellman Psychology, we provide LGBTQ Counseling Chicago with professionals who are not only trained, but deeply experienced in navigating the complex layers of queer and trans identities.

2. Pressure to Educate Your Therapist

Let’s be real — therapy should not feel like a teaching gig.

Too often, LGBTQ clients end up spending valuable session time explaining basic terms or advocating for their identity. This emotional labor adds a frustrating barrier to healing. And it’s not just exhausting — it can also prevent progress, especially if your therapist doesn’t grasp the deeper cultural and historical context of your experiences.

How to Overcome It:
You deserve a therapist who meets you where you are. If you find yourself constantly educating your therapist, that’s a red flag. Try using directories like Psychology Today, Therapy for Queer People of Color, or directly contacting practices like Wellman Psychology, where LGBTQ knowledge is part of the foundation — not an afterthought.

3. Intersectionality Gets Ignored

Being LGBTQ is just one part of your identity. But in therapy, it often becomes the only focus.

What happens when you're queer and Black? Or trans and disabled? Or a gay immigrant navigating trauma? Too many therapists don’t account for how these layered identities interact. This leads to generalized advice and surface-level support that misses the core of what you're dealing with.

A 2019 study from the Williams Institute found that LGBTQ people of color experience higher rates of discrimination and poorer mental health outcomes, yet are the least likely to receive culturally competent care.

How to Overcome It:
Prioritize therapists who understand the concept of intersectionality and who actively explore how your multiple identities shape your mental health. At Wellman Psychology, our LGBTQ Counseling in Chicago centers the whole person, acknowledging race, gender, class, ability, and cultural background, not just your sexuality or gender identity.

4. Misdiagnosis Due to Gender or Sexual Identity Bias

Did you know that trans and non-binary individuals are more likely to be misdiagnosed with personality disorders?

That’s because some mental health professionals mistake gender dysphoria, identity exploration, or trauma responses for pathology. For example, a non-binary person navigating fluid gender expression might be wrongly labeled as unstable. These misdiagnoses can have long-term consequences, from insurance issues to internalized stigma.

How to Overcome It:
If a diagnosis doesn’t feel right, it’s okay to question it. Seek a second opinion, especially from someone with experience in gender-affirming care. Wellman Psychology’s clinicians are trained to differentiate between identity exploration and mental illness, ensuring you receive accurate, affirming support.

5. Reluctance to Discuss Relationship Structures

Let’s talk about polyamory, kink, open relationships, and chosen families — all common and valid in LGBTQ communities.

Unfortunately, many therapists still operate within a heteronormative, monogamous framework. This creates shame or silence around alternative relationship structures, which can be vital sources of support for queer and trans folks.

How to Overcome It:
Be upfront about your relationship dynamics and watch how the therapist responds. Are they curious and respectful, or do they seem judgmental? At Wellman Psychology, we recognize the diversity of queer relationships and provide space for you to explore them without shame or awkwardness.

6. Internalized Homophobia or Transphobia Isn’t Addressed

Sometimes, the biggest battle is the one inside.

LGBTQ clients may carry years of internalized messages about being "wrong" or "broken," especially if they were raised in religious or conservative environments. Unfortunately, some therapists avoid addressing these deeper wounds — or worse, unintentionally reinforce them by glossing over their roots.

A 2023 study in the Journal of LGBTQ Issues in Counseling found that internalized stigma was significantly linked to anxiety, depression, and suicidality among queer clients, but that affirming therapy markedly reduced these symptoms over time.

How to Overcome It:
Therapy should be a space where you can unpack all parts of your identity, including the painful bits. An affirming therapist will help you challenge internalized narratives and rebuild a sense of self-worth. Wellman Psychology’s LGBTQ Counseling Chicago service is designed to gently navigate these topics, fostering real, long-term healing.

7. Lack of Focus on Joy and Resilience

Let’s flip the narrative for a moment: queer joy, trans resilience, and chosen family are powerful, life-giving forces.

Yet, therapy often becomes focused on trauma, neglecting the vibrant, affirming parts of LGBTQ life. This not only reinforces a “broken” narrative but also misses opportunities to build on strengths and joy.

How to Overcome It:
Ask your therapist if they incorporate strengths-based or resilience-based approaches. Therapy should be about more than surviving — it should be about thriving. At Wellman Psychology, we celebrate your wins, honor your joy, and believe that mental health care should uplift, not just repair.

Summary

Therapy should be a healing, validating space, but for LGBTQ individuals, the path to finding that space can be filled with roadblocks. From cultural disconnects and misdiagnoses to overlooked identities and lack of joy, there are challenges that many don’t talk about enough. But the good news? There are ways through it. You deserve care that sees all of you, honors your lived experiences, and helps you grow, not just cope.

If you’re part of the LGBTQ community and tired of feeling misunderstood in therapy, it’s time to try something different. At Wellman Psychology, we specialize in LGBTQ Counseling Chicago that’s authentic, affirming, and culturally competent. Whether you’re navigating identity, trauma, relationships, or just life, you don’t have to do it alone. Our clinicians are here to support you, not judge you.

Reach out today and let’s start building a version of therapy that actually works for you.

Feel free to check out our social media links below:

• Facebook 

• Instagram

• Twitter

• GMB

Find out more articles that can help you below:

The Importance of LGBTQ Awareness Month for Mental Health

How Does Trauma Affect Memory

How Long Does EMDR Take for Complex Trauma

How Therapy Can Help Overcome Eating Disorders

Have you ever felt like food controls your life, even when you're trying your hardest to stay in control?

If you nodded (even just internally), you’re not alone. Eating disorders can quietly invade our thoughts, behaviors, and emotions, affecting not only how we eat but how we live. While there’s a lot of talk online about what eating disorders look like or how they’re diagnosed, what’s less discussed is how therapy actually works to heal the inner battles that fuel them—and how different it looks from person to person.

Whether you’re struggling with binge eating, restrictive habits, purging, or obsessive food rituals, this article will walk you through how therapy can help you reclaim a healthy relationship with food—and yourself.

What Therapy Actually Does for Eating Disorders (Beyond the Obvious)

When people think of therapy for eating disorders, they often picture sitting on a couch and talking about food or weight. But therapy is much deeper and more dynamic than that. It's not just about eating habits—it's about why those habits developed in the first place.

Therapists trained in eating disorder treatment aim to help you:

• Identify emotional triggers that lead to disordered eating

• Rebuild body trust and self-image

• Challenge perfectionistic and black-and-white thinking

• Address underlying anxiety, trauma, or depression

• Rewire negative belief systems that keep the disorder going

One of the most effective therapeutic approaches is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), which has been shown in multiple studies to significantly reduce symptoms in bulimia nervosa, binge eating disorder, and even anorexia. According to a 2021 meta-analysis published in The Lancet Psychiatry, CBT led to remission in up to 45% of individuals with eating disorders, higher than medication alone or no treatment at all.

But therapy isn’t one-size-fits-all. That’s where it gets interesting.

What Most People Don’t Talk About: The Healing Power of the Therapeutic Relationship

Here’s something that rarely makes it into the mainstream articles: the therapist-client relationship itself is a healing force.

A study published in Psychotherapy Research in 2019 showed that the strength of the therapeutic alliance—how safe, heard, and supported you feel by your therapist—is the most consistent predictor of recovery outcomes in eating disorder treatment.

Many individuals with eating disorders report feeling isolated or misunderstood by friends, family, or even doctors. So having a space where you’re accepted exactly as you are, where you don’t have to pretend or perform, can be life-changing. That trust allows you to take emotional risks, try new behaviors, and start viewing yourself through a more compassionate lens.

Stats That Might Surprise You

• Up to 30 million Americans will struggle with an eating disorder at some point in their lives (ANAD, 2023).

• More than 50% of people with eating disorders also meet the criteria for an anxiety disorder (National Eating Disorders Association).

• Despite these numbers, only 1 in 10 receives proper treatment (ANAD, 2023).

• In a 2022 study published in Frontiers in Psychology, patients who engaged in integrative, personalized therapy (including psychodynamic and somatic approaches) reported long-term improvements in emotional regulation, not just eating behaviors.

What does that mean? It means therapy doesn’t just help you stop the behavior. It helps you heal from the inside out.

Therapy Can Go Beyond Talking—It Can Reshape Your Nervous System

Yep, we’re getting a little nerdy here, but this is too important not to mention.

Newer approaches like Somatic Therapy, Internal Family Systems (IFS), and Polyvagal Theory-based treatments go beyond talk therapy to address how trauma and stress are stored in the body. This matters for eating disorders because many symptoms, like compulsive bingeing, restriction, or purging, aren’t logical. They’re physiological coping mechanisms.

These approaches help individuals:

• Recognize how the body signals distress

• Learn to regulate the nervous system without relying on food rituals

• Increase tolerance for discomfort without self-harm or avoidance

• Strengthen inner “parts” of themselves that carry wisdom and resilience

So if traditional CBT hasn’t worked for you, don’t give up—there are other methods worth exploring.

Healing Doesn’t Happen Alone—And It Shouldn’t

Let’s get real: recovering from an eating disorder is hard. It can feel exhausting, frustrating, and even scary. But you don’t have to do it alone.

At Wellman Psychology, our team specializes in helping individuals in Chicago move beyond disordered eating and into fuller, more connected lives. Through Eating Disorder Therapy Chicago, we create personalized plans based on who you are, not just your symptoms. Whether you’re just starting to explore therapy or you’ve tried before and didn’t feel seen, we’re here to walk alongside you without judgment.

We integrate evidence-based tools like CBT and DBT with relational and somatic approaches that honor the complexity of your experience. Our focus isn’t just on "fixing" eating behaviors—it’s about helping you reconnect with your body, your values, and your sense of self.

What Recovery Really Looks Like (Spoiler: It’s Not Linear)

Another thing you don’t hear enough? Recovery is not a straight line.

Some days you might feel like you’ve conquered the hardest parts, and then other days, old habits resurface. That doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means you’re human.

Therapy helps you ride the waves of recovery with more resilience. It teaches you to:

• Practice self-compassion when you slip up

• Understand relapse as a signal, not a setback

• Keep building new tools, even when the old ones try to sneak back in

• See progress in emotional growth, not just food-related milestones

And sometimes, therapy helps you uncover things you never realized were linked to your eating disorder—like attachment wounds, perfectionism, or people-pleasing tendencies.

Key Takeaways

• Eating disorders are not just about food—they’re about emotions, beliefs, and nervous system patterns.

• Therapy works by addressing the root causes of disordered eating, not just the behaviors.

• You don’t need to “hit rock bottom” to benefit from therapy—early intervention leads to better outcomes.

• There are many therapeutic approaches beyond traditional CBT, including somatic and relational therapies that can unlock deeper healing.

• You deserve a therapist who sees you as a whole person, not just a diagnosis.

If you're tired of fighting this battle on your own, know this: real help is out there, and recovery is possible.

At Wellman Psychology, we’re committed to helping you feel more empowered, less alone, and more in tune with your body and emotions. Our Eating Disorder Therapy Chicago service offers personalized care for every step of your journey. Whether you're just beginning or picking yourself back up, you don’t have to go it alone. Let us walk with you toward healing, freedom, and self-acceptance.

Reach out today. A better relationship with food—and yourself—can start right now.

Feel free to check out our social media links below:

• Facebook 

• Instagram

• Twitter

• GMB

Find out more articles that can help you below:

Steps to Recover from Binge Eating Disorder with Professional Help

What Are the Symptoms of Binge Eating Disorder?

What Is Clinical Assessment in Psychology